Continuing this puddle of sithspit.

Story or Series Title: Cruel Trick of Fate
Fandom: Lord of the Jedi
CulpritAuthor's Name: TDWidow
Full Names: Obi-Wan Kenobi (aka Hyarion), Aragorn son of Arathorn
Full Species: Edain
Hair Color (Include Adjectives): Like in canon, I presume
Eye Color (Include Adjectives): Like in canon, I presume
Unusual Markings/Colorations: I presume they both have scars from the battles they've been in.
Special Possessions: Aragorn has a uterus
Annoying Origin: Unknown, Arathorn II and Gilraen
Annoying Connections to Canon Characters: Claim to be two of them, are Mara Skywalker's parents.
Annoying Special Abilities: In addition to the mpreg, there's the matter of Obi-Wan taking Arwen's place in Aragorn's heart
Other Annoying Traits: 0o9iuihjnbhgh6tftrfcc dxfdre4

( Getting his bearings )

( Enter Gandalf )

A few weeks ago, I decided to apply to a game on livejournal with an already existing character from my LARP. As I was writing her down, I realized, she was, well, pretty sue-ish, mostly because I didn't have a lot of her character nailed down. Because of this, she was rejected, and I was inspired to flesh her out a little bit.

Fandom: Generic medieval fantasy LARP
Character Name: Sir Mitternacht Integra Valdyr

( Sir Mitternacht... )

So, I've done a lot of tweaking and 'nailing down' already, but she's definitely not the solid, well-developed character I hope she becomes. Thoughts?

TITLE: goddesses of the moon (harry potter story)
PERPETRATOR: somebodys15angel
SUE-O-METER: (toxic)

FULL NAME: Serena McGonagall.
SPECIES: Goddess/Daughters of the moon.
HAIR: "short la-yered brown hair with blond streaks straight"
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: a scar from where her abusive father hit her on the chin.
POSSESSIONS: "a red halter top and jean shorts". A sue-friend named Jimena a, who has a tattoo below her belly-button. A moon goddess amulet that emits energy whenever a "follower" (bad guy) is near.

ORIGIN: McGonagall's granddaughter. She comes from the States to help find Hermione and Kina the other moon goddesses. They were sent to protect the earth and have some bad guys called "Atrox" chasing after them.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Has some sort of grand mission regarding protecting the earth and fleeing danger. But really she is paired with Oliver Wood mostly. But it turns out that Oliver is actually the bad guy and this Stanton person is not-so-bad?
SPECIAL ABILITIES: She can read minds. Knows kung-fu.

NOTES: Glitter should never be used in this quantity: "She pulls a red satin halter out of her closet and a red skirt with gold pleads in it and she changes. She rubs gold and red glitter all over her arms and legs and chest and she puts some around her hair line and she puts gold eye shadow on and paints flames down her arms and legs and she puts gems a crossed her hair line and one on each corner of her eyes. She turns to see Kina in the doorway in a pink dress that ends just above her knees that has a bunch of layers on the bottom that comes to points in different shades of pink and purple she has pink and purple glitter all over her legs arms neck and a glitter star on her cheek and she painted vines down her arms and legs. They put their shoes on and walk out to see Hermione in a light blue satin tank top and skirt with darker blue on the bottom and a dark blue scarf tied around her neck with blue glitter all over her and some through her hair. She has blue and silver flames up her legs."

( I love how Oliver defines the Sue in his dialogue. )

Let the OOCness continue!

Thanks to blazzano for sending in this Sue!

TITLE: Ginny Weasley: Supervixen
PERPETRATOR: thebartender713
SUE-O-METER: (toxic)

FULL NAME: Ginny Weasley
SPECIES: Supervixen?
HAIR: red
EYES: not described
MARKINGS: none described
POSSESSIONS: a "maple, with Dragon Heartstring as the core","Black knee high combat-like boots, a short black pleated skirt (for extreme freedom of movement), a black tank top and black outer robes", a second wand: "ebony with phoenix feather", and then Harry's wand.

ORIGIN: Harry is killed, Hermione refuses to fight because she'd rather be "a crooked politician", a pregnant Ginny goes in to take on Voldemort. The ceiling crashes in, he dies and she is in a coma for seven months. When she wakes up she takes charge of her care, and denies access to anyone who might be reporting to Hermione.
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Hermione was going to use Exavier Potter as a tool to stay in government. So, Ginny had the baby in secret and then sent it away to India to live. Ginny pretended that a transfigured pillow was her stillborn son. Hermione doesn't believe her, of course. After she rehabilitates from her coma and pregnancy, she leaves to go find Voldemort. She wants him to be the "outlet for her rage".
SPECIAL ABILITIES: A "powerful" witch.

NOTES: Annnnddd I stopped reading when it got to the scene with Draco. I was just too squicked. The end.

( The Suethor and pstibbons should have a canon-sue showdown. )

Story or Series Title: Cruel Trick of Fate
Fandom: Lord of the Jedi
CulpritAuthor's Name: TDWidow
Full Names: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Aragorn son of Arathorn
Full Species: Edain
Hair Color (Include Adjectives): Like in canon, I presume
Eye Color (Include Adjectives): Like in canon, I presume
Unusual Markings/Colorations: I presume they both have scars from the battles they've been in.
Special Possessions: Aragorn has a uterus
Annoying Origin: Unknown, Arathorn II and Gilraen
Annoying Connections to Canon Characters: Claim to be two of them, are Mara Skywalker's parents.
Annoying Special Abilities: In addition to the mpreg, there's the matter of Obi-Wan taking Arwen's place in Aragorn's heart
Other Annoying Traits: 0o9iuihjnbhgh6tftrfcc dxfdre4

( The summary )

( Crash Landing )

( In Karningul )

( Previous chapters )

Story or Series Title: The Girl in the Tower
Fandom: The Boy Who Set a Five-Step Mamba on the Suethors
CulpritAuthor's Name: SpookyMulder
Full Name: Sara Lemke
Full Species: Species 5618
Hair Color(Include Adjectives): Like a mood ring
Eye Color(Include Adjectives): "…the bluest violet…"
Unusual Markings/Colorations: A black widow mark from when she murdered Lucius Malfoy
Special Possessions: Harry's balls, the Marauders' Map
Annoying Origin: A family that skipped the country to hide from Riddle
Annoying Connections to Canon Characters: Dumbledore's niece, Harry's girlfriend
Annoying Special Abilites: Elemental powers
Other Annoying Traits: 4we57hj7 m8u9i0]-p]\=[

( Rescuing Draco Malfoy )

( At the dance )

TITLE: The Demon Lord
PERPETRATOR: Dark Dragen
SUE-O-METER: (toxic)

FULL NAME: Harry Potter, the Demon Lord. LMAO! I'm picturing skinny little Harry as a demon!
SPECIES: demon
HAIR: red
EYES: He doesn't need glasses anymore. "his eye although still green, had a hint of red in them"
MARKINGS: black wings, muscles, "his facial features were now more defined and better looking", his scar is gone.
POSSESSIONS: a "Power Ritual book" that he uses to unlock his demon powers.

ORIGIN: Typical "Woe" backstory complete with abusive uncle!
CONNECTIONS TO CANON: Hates everyone. The pairing at ff.net says he'll be with Daphene Greengrass.
SPECIAL ABILITIES: Super-hot. Can change how he looks and his gender at will.

NOTES: A penis that is "now thicker and about nine inches long". I'm imaging Genoa Salami size. He'll clearly need some sort of supportive device. A male must have written this story, hands and giant penis down.

( Funniest thing I have ever read. EVER. )

( Previous chapters )

Story or Series Title: The Girl in the Tower
Fandom: The Boy Who Set a Five-Step Mamba on the Suethors
CulpritAuthor's Name: SpookyMulder
Full Name: Sara Lemke
Full Species: Species 5618
Hair Color(Include Adjectives): Like a mood ring
Eye Color(Include Adjectives): "…the bluest violet…"
Unusual Markings/Colorations: A black widow mark from when she murdered Lucius Malfoy
Special Possessions: Harry's balls, the Marauders' Map
Annoying Origin: A family that skipped the country to hide from Riddle
Annoying Connections to Canon Characters: Dumbledore's niece, Harry's girlfriend
Annoying Special Abilites: Elemental powers
Other Annoying Traits: 4we57hj7 m8u9i0]-p]\=[

( She still can't decide who she loves )

( Sic Transit Riddle )

( Previous chapters )

Story or Series Title: The Girl in the Tower
Fandom: The Boy Who Set a Five-Step Mamba on the Suethors
CulpritAuthor's Name: SpookyMulder
Full Name: Sara Lemke
Full Species: Species 5618
Hair Color(Include Adjectives): Like a mood ring
Eye Color(Include Adjectives): "…the bluest violet…"
Unusual Markings/Colorations: A black widow mark from when she murdered Lucius Malfoy
Special Possessions: Harry's balls, the Marauders' Map
Annoying Origin: A family that skipped the country to hide from Riddle
Annoying Connections to Canon Characters: Dumbledore's niece, Harry's girlfriend
Annoying Special Abilites: Elemental powers
Other Annoying Traits: 4we57hj7 m8u9i0]-p]\=[

( Read more... )

( Or is it? )

Anyone remember this little gem?  It's that insane story where Legolas and Co bamfed to Hogwarts, Harry was an alcoholic who puked up Salazar, Godric hatched out of an egg, Snape fed Viagra to Legolas and Harry, Ginny went nuts, Hermione turned into the Wicked Witch of the West, and the author used a paragraph where one word would do.

It's been updated!

Story Or Series Title: Love of a Different Kind
Fandom: The Boy-Who-Lived-To-Shower-With-Hobbits
Culprit Author's Name: Medusa; The Ancient Snake

Full Name (plus titles if any): Harry Potter
Full Species(es): I haven't got a cluicus Stuicus
Hair Color (include adjectives): The shining beams from the full moon above made the boy’s raven hair shimmer like black silk,
Eye Color (include adjectives): his eyes glowing like emeralds
Unusual Markings/Colorations: That scar thingy
Special Possessions (if any): A new wardrobe that matches Legoals', a wand, a mentor named Snape, a secret letter from Sal, tons of angst, bulimia that turned out to be a snake in his gut, a cute new pet, and a burning desire for revenge on Snape.

Annoying Origin: I can't even begin to imagine where this one came from
Annoying Connections To Canon Characters: Let's see, spends his summer holidays at Hogwarts with the Fellowship, has a Papa Alby, vomits Salazar Slytherin, learns Snape's deepest secrets, sits on Hagrid's shoulder, introduces the Hobbits to the Giant Squid, "entertains" Legolas, sees Godric Gryffindor naked, yells at everyone else,
Annoying Special Abilities: Bounces back and forth between smart ass retorts and infantile babble
Other Annoying Traits: I found it

Please include a small sample of the worst of this story: 

( Quidditch, Mud, and Hobbit Packages )